Growing up if I ever had the chance to hold a grudge I would. In the area that I was born and raised in was Coral Springs, FL a clean and modern city just outside of Miami next to Boca Raton. I love my hometown even driving through the basic streets can be inspirational but when it comes to the teenagers…well the girls are stubborn and the boys are even more stubborn. Even when I became a Christian at 15 I continued to hold grudges no matter how many years I had to hold on. It wasn’t until I ended one of the few relationships I had been in, in my 21 years of existence. My decision to end this long term relationship was hard but I couldn’t have anything distract me from starting my career in L.A., which was 3,000 miles away from him. Even though I wanted an amicable split he was mean, aggressive, and out of control. The man I called my best friend and my boyfriend who I had loved had turned into a monster. I was hurting but above all I was angry. My close friends were also going through break ups but they took their hate down an even more vicious path. I watched them rebound which seemed to be worse than a heartache. They were in such denial of their pain that nothing else matter to them except using these new men to make them forget their old loves. Their hate had taken them far…so far away from home in a world filled with strangers. I couldn’t watch let alonedo what they were doing. It was then that I decided to not hate and instead let go. When I used to hate I lost all creativity…it was sad. So right now for example I’ve had some of my closest friends turn on me over the weekend. I actually don’t know why because they won’t tell me. Maybe I did something and didn’t know it. I spent a day trying to think back if I had done anything or not. Finally I realized that the people who were hating me for what appears to be no apparent reason have hate elsewhere in their lives. Instead of angry text messages back and forth, or waiting with an empty stomach with an unknown response I simply ‘wish them the best’ and block their number until I feel that they have calmed down.
If you let go of a feather and t comes back to you then it was never meant to be let go. But if it flies away then it was never yours to begin with. Now you can either fight that theory and waste your energy. . .or you can move on and possibly find something even better. The choice is yours and yours alone.